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Unique Interviews With Unique People

1.) Why don't you wear Chapstick?
Tiffany J: I do wear Chapstick.
Greta R: I do.
Max M: Because everyone who wears it is a douche.
2.) If someone threw food at you, what would you do?
Tiffany J: Throw it back! Is that what you're supposed to do? I would just sauce it...YEET.
Greta R: Depends, I would probably eat it if it was a good food.
Max M: Eat the food.
3.) What did you do when you encountered a bear?
Tiffany J: I've never encountered a bear.
Greta R: "I love bears."
Max M: I've never seen a bear, so no.
4.) Why don't you like tomatoes?
Tiffany J: 'Cuz they're a fruit and they shouldn't be, got me f***** up!!
Greta R: I like to eat them with cinnamon and sugar.
Max M: Umm, because they're like the zits of fruit.
5.)Why do you like cats more than dogs?
Tiffany J: I don't, I'm allergic to cats, they got me f***** up!!
Greta R: They're softer.
Max M: because cat's tails move cooler.
6.)What did you do to people that hurt you or someone you were close to?
Tiffany J: I'd knock a b**** out! I'd sauce the head into the river!
Greta R: I don't know, I don't talk to them.
Max M: Cried at home.
7.) What do you do when you're sad?
Tiffany J: "I be happy."
Greta R: I prolly, like drive around, eat food, or sleep a lot.
Max M: Um.. Well wake up.
8.) How do you help those who need it?
Tiffany J: "Ya help 'em."
Greta R: Lots of hugs.
Max M: I don't, I keep all the help for myself.
9.) Why do you like my dog, Gracie?
Tiffany J: Oh DUDE, Gracie, her haircuts get to me so much. You and Gracie? Can't handle.
Greta R: I don't know a Gracie.
Max M: I hate it, I hate it with my whole being!
10.) What do you do with your spare time whilst driving?
Tiffany J: "Play music."
Greta R: I usually, like listen to music and enjoy scenery.
Max M: I try to see how many pedestrians I can hit, I keep a tally.
11.) Why won't you let me get a dog?
Tiffany J: 'Cuz you have three already Vicky.
Greta R: Because you don't deserve one.
Max M: Because every dog I see, I stomp on it.
12.) How would you go about driving at 3:30 AM in thick fog?
Tiffany J: "REEAAAAL SLOW."
Greta R: I'd turn my brights on.
Max M: I'd drive as fast as I could and close my eyes so it wouldn't be scary.

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